Back Again?

Its been sometime since I posted something on my blog. I was busy, and things were haphazard. With a downtrodden ride with H1N1, and back, I think its time I start blogging again.

There were many things that happened between the previous post and this one. It would amount to a lot lot. Will start blogging on those detailed.

As a summary, I finally managed to quit at IBM and took a challenging position in Canada. New place, new people, new life, new job. After being in the cocoon of IBM for a long time, now that I am out, on my own, is teaching me loads everyday, rather every hour.

Rest in next!

Steeped Learning Curve!

Confusions are good in life. There is a saying in Tamil, and when translated it is like this “One can’t fish in a clear pond”. It is true. Unless you are confused, you are not thinking; if you are not thinking you are probably going to be wrong.

There were many things that were happening today. Two most important things that confused me are these:

1. My managers were as usual fucking me with lots of work, so I was thinking on how to handle it, and learnt that I have to search between my legs to find some balls. Will probably be doing in the coming days.

2. I got a chance to talk frankly with a girl, and this time I learnt who I really am, and found out that I am not the person I was imagining. I am searching for some balls, and answer on Who am I really!

I will probably explain these later in other posts. For now, I feel good. I am thinking. I really am, after a long long time.

So far so good! lets see, what the life has for me in the package!

How to handle these people??

I am a Functional Test Automation engineer, I would like to act and think that I am one, and I am striving to be good at it, and I have been good so far. I am dealing with a bunch of people in the recent times where they are of one single thought that I am a Stupid who talks on Automation and could never do! What the heck?

These guys started working on something called BPT, which is a concept and an automation framework. There is an SME (not me) who is assigned this work. Since I am from the same lot, I could not take my mind out of it. During the start of this implementation I told them number of times, that the design that you are about to be implemented is more important than the actual work. They could not understand that!

Test automation is NOT a fancy Harry Potter’s magic wand to create a PETRONAS charm. It is a development project that would help testers to achieve a better quality. The major advantage of any proper automation is to achieve at the decent granularity. These guys have done some thing that is pissing me off to the core. No proper work what so ever!! God help the team and the company!!

No Communication, No Design, No proper coding, and moreover, when someone is telling that these are missing NO Respect to such an advice. Today I learnt the hardest lesson of my life. Do your work, and Shut the fuck up. Even if some one is fucking up something that is out of your purview, you stay shut. It is easy said than done. I don’t know what exactly I should do to get this out of my head. That’s what is my mission now, taking it off my head, and I am going to face a lot of hiccups in that process. Lots of fight within myself, between my conscience and my mind.

I was planning to take it up further level, warn my manager of a foreseen pitfall here, and pitch in and clear it up. But, now I decided to keep my mouth shut. No more involvement in this automation team, come what may.

The most funniest part in the entire thing is the argument that I had with my so called SME (the most amateurish one that any one can imagine). These are some of her lines:

> “You can’t create a complete design without coding, design and coding goes in parallel”  - a developer will laugh his ass off the moment he hears this line.
> “More number of components, I will have to remember them to use them”  - yeah really good one, you are worried that you have to use your brain and memory. super!
> “I cant learn the functionality, just for the purpose of creating test scripts for them” – Perfect, I cant comment on this one!!
> “I will create whatever I can, if the client wants to take it up, then let them, or I can justify why that cant be done”  - fuck the client, I will build the house that I like, if he wants to live in it let him, or let him build his own. (even though I am supposed to be building a house for him)
> “I have my framework and it works for me, if you have a framework, you use it”  - He He He, proves the ego.
> “I cant teach the customer to use the automation scripts, I create it, I use it” – Fuck the world. If, I want to run nude in the streets, I will.

One thing is clear from all these statements, she should be taught on what it is to be in a position to face the client and talk to him at a higher level, the designer level, than at a coder level. She has that excellent possessive and egoistic quality that if you say that something is wrong, she NEVER accepts that, and says that “who are you to tell me that, you know nothing, I am the king in this, and I am the only one in the world who knows this, you are shit to me”.

After seeing that kind of an attitude, I decided no more telling, let her ask this question with the manager when he asks the same question. She is not my sister or a girl-friend. Out of some corner friendship, if I wanted to help, this is one nice response that I got.

HA HA HA, that is going to be fun to watch. I covered my bases. Thanks! Good lesson.

What I hate is what I love

The answer is computer. I have always loved computer and working on it, from 3rd grade to be precise, that is when I saw computer first in my life, when taken on a “field trip” to a computer company, to show us what computers are. Love at first sight. I don’t know why. This is my reason why I selected Computer Science to be my major in High School and Information Technology for my undergrad.

If I start working on a project on my own, I forget the world around me, forget food, sleep, life, everything. All that will be in my mind is this. I enjoy doing that. Even today if I am doing something that is interesting on my comp, oh man I go back to be the same self, to that state of eternal bliss, walking on the clouds, just thinking.

May be this is why I hate it also. Now that I wanted to see something outside of this computer, I cannot. I am not able to see the world without computer, or my world without one. I had created a too far self dependency on that. Every day I open my eyes to see computer and fall asleep seeing it. Nothing else is there in my life. Since this is going beyond limits, I am now starting to feel a hatred towards that. I want to know, what is life without a computer.

Even though I love and I am into computers so much, did I do anything exceptional? Nope. I am one of the 400,000 employees in my company, and one in a few million IT Engineers. What is my specialty? My unique quality? or to put it simply, “without computer in the picture, WHO AM I? WHAT AM I?” I have not done anything so far to define myself to be a human.

To talk about my work! Dude! May be that is the one that made me hate what I love. The same shit, different day! It is a Saturday today, and I cannot think anything but my work. Oh! of course there is work and it needs to be done, but brooding over it for 24 hours makes anyone mad. And, the major problem is the people that I work with. I have a team member, if I say “He does not know what a computer is”, I am not overstating. It is a fact. I ask him to do anything, all he comes back with is a simple, “I don’t know how to do it Krishnan”.

I am not sure what I am going to do, to find a solution for this!!!

Man! I am pissed…

DAMN! I am trying to keep the cool, but might actually burst out any time. I am completely pissed today. Highly unprofessional attitude. These guys should be bent over and fucked royally, wearing a condom of steel.

On the last day, the team member comes and says that, it will not work that way, where she agreed to the same thing some days before, and when asked why she agreed then, all I got was a startling reply, “I was not feeling well then, and I was not in a position to answer properly”

Moreover, I have no time on this project, she had already burnt, all those hours that they had asked for and twice more than that. And the fun part is that, what ever she had worked till yesterday was 100% wrong, and she had to redo everything, and whatever she did is not working also!!

Man I am definitely PISSED!!!

People make mistakes, and can be understood and forgiven. But, BLUNDERS? Heights of Atrocity!!

The MAD living!!

My mood is only on one thing. It is the one, the one that I am waiting for. Its been almost a month. I cannot clearly say here what it is and what it is related to.

I cannot concentrate on my work, cannot sleep properly, cannot eat, almost in a state of desperation. No idea what this state of mind means. I am supposed to be a calm and composed person, but what is it that is driving me crazy? and why?

The answer is simple, too much of self inflicted hatred on one thing, made me look out for the next thing. This is what probed the chain of events. Now that the hatred is blooming day by day with that thing, it is driving me nuts. This is the blocker now, for me to bite the apple that I am trying to reach out.

Waiting. Highly Impatiently waiting. Eagerly waiting. But that's all I can do about it. Wait. This is completely out of my control. I think I have to take this as a next chapter of lesson that my life is giving to me. “If you cant control something that is out of your control, then learn to be patient, whatever your situation is”

The lesson of Lions, the king of the jungle, the lesson of Masters, the kings of the world. They were patient at some or the other point in their life, waiting for that right chord. The right note, the right time, moment. I am starting to practice patience!!!

Om!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Sealed Mouth

I am in a complete catch 22 situation. I have some work to do. It is challenging and I have got to be given one of these. I know I am the right person to do it. My creativity on this today is like, I myself could not believe, that I have so much in me.

But, in the situation I am (currently I cannot say that here!), I cannot commit to the way I want to achieve this work to be done. The major hiccup in this is the time. Ideas are flowing in like the great Ganges. Time is drawing out like a blade. I am sure that these will get me a 1 rating this time, in my annual appraisal, but again in my situation, I cannot commit.

It is hell to have the juicy, healthy fruit in hand but the mouth sealed!!! Damn!

Some more micro!

The sincere proofreader…
I was proof reading the first copy of a marriage invitation when my dad yelled at me: “Do it properly! It is your marriage!”

The great colleague
When I asked my colleague to read my blog, she quipped “Should I review and comment?”

Pinnacle of reluctance
I am blogging during office hours when I have 14 deliverables to be made in 2 hours!

My try @ micro

I got an inspiration when I read the flash micro by Ernest Hemmingway. It goes like this.

“For Sale: Baby shoes, never worn”.

This is one damn cool shortest story that any one can write. I read many more on the world wide web.

Here are some of my attempts:

On my way to glory
“Yes, yes, yes … I am there … almost … keep pumping … woof woof woof … closing in … aaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwwwww!!!!!! Grrrrr YES!!! Yaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhooooooooooo!! I won my country, its first Olympic Gold!!!”

Why don’t you understand?
To win: 6 Runs of 2 balls, Sachin at the crease and I was on my nerve. I lost it when I heard some junkie shouted at me: “Jamal, pray for India not Pakistan”

The God’s confusion!
God was on a trip to India as a human, he was confused when applying for School, the application read:

“Religion: _______ Caste: ________ Section: OC/BC/MBC/SC/ST”

The pathetic joke
Most increasing variables in the world are: Indian Population, Indian Reservation, Indian Poverty

The birth of a new caste
Dalits converted to Christianity in India, on hearing that Christianity do not have castes. Few months later, a newspaper article read: “20 killed in Nadar Christians-Dalit Christians caste riot”

Clutter, Clutter and More Clutter…

That’s how my apartment is currently. The Kitchen is a clutter and so is my living room and my bedroom.

Just started to clean and no mood to clean. But no options, too much of mosquitoes around. Should get rid of them!

Here it goes, a guy pinging me!!!

Aayirathil Oruvan – Music Review 2

I guess from now on I should stop reviewing music at its first instance. GV Prakash Kumar, does have some stuff. I take back my comment now. Here is the detailed review of the 10 Songs:

1. Oh Eesa-Composers Mix (Karthik, Andrea Jeremiah)
Lyrics: Selvaraghavan & Andrea Jeremiah
Comment: Nice Mixing. The base is however lifted from “Govinda Govinda”, the song that anyone can hear when travelling to Tirupathi. Just remixed with a change in lyrics. The lyrics are just ok.

2. Maalai Neram (Andrea Jeremiah, G. V. Prakash Kumar)
Lyrics: Selvaraghavan
Comment: The song starts with nice guitar prelude. Andrea is pretty damn good. Lyrics are very well. No idea if Selvaraghavan really wrote this or he is also a person with some ghost writers! The song is good. But this genre is getting pretty bored. The same genre as “Vaseegara” / “AnaL mele pani thuli” (a lady singing about love with a lot of base in her voice!!).

3. Un Mela Aasadhaan (Dhanush, Andrea Jeremiah, Aishwarya Dhanush)
Lyrics: Selvaraghavan
Comment: Song for the masses. The perfect song to hear while drinking. Dhanush singing this song, no comments. If he practices really he can sing like the young Ilayaraaja (well close to, when the genre is gaana). He is kind of acceptable as long as he sings non classical oriented songs. One more singer in the line of Gaana.

4. The King Arrives (Instrumental)
Performed by Neil Mukherjee & Madras Augistin Choir
Comment: Again one more song with many lifts. Majority lift is from Metallica. There are also bits and pieces of other Rock Lifts. Some lifts are from ARR (Warriors of Heaven and Earth). Queen also shows their head up at some instance. May be GV Prakash was forced into a track of Heavy Metal and he got confused. Sounds good. With Selva handling the camera, hoping a better one.

5. Thaai Thindra Mannae (The Cholan Ecstasy) (Vijay Yesudas, Nithyasree Mahadevan & Shri Krishna)
Lyrics: Vairamuthu, Vetoori Sundarrama Moorthy(Telugu)
Comment: Vijay Yesudas, got a gift from his dad, really his voice. Vijay needs some more practice though. The song starts with a Telugu classical song and then moves to tamil, taken back to telugu. Similar to “Ra Ra”  of Chandramukhi. The Lyrics are amazing. Simply to say, I am no where nearly qualified to comment on Nits. She is as usual amazing!!! She moves along the song just like a sweet teenage girl with her voice, while Vijay provides the maturity in the song. Composition in this song sounds Damn Matured! Applauses to GVP here!

6. Pemmane (P. B. Srinivas, Bombay Jayashree)
Lyrics: Vairamuthu
Comment: Damn Cool song. The diamond in the entire necklace. Amazing. PBS proves that “Man can get old, his passions need not”. BJ has her own flair.

7. Celebration of Life (Instrumental)
Performed By Naveen
Comment: Music Magic. Damn good. ARR’s Warriors of heaven and earth might pop up sometimes, but not so clearly noticeable. Am still trying to find the song behind the composition. Yuvan also shows his head sometimes. GV, you are moving on Deva’s track. Time to change gears and start thinking, rather imagining.

8. Thaai Thindra Mannae (Classical Version) (Vijay Yesudas)
Lyrics: Vairamuthu
Comment: Perfect Mixture. Sounds like a mix of “Vidai Kodu engal naade” and “Kallai Mattum Kandaal”. Good Song. LYRICS ARE TOTALLY WICKED COOL!!! Its really been ages since I had listened to such a language richness in tamil song.

9. Indha Padhai (G. V. Prakash Kumar)
Lyrics: Selvaraghavan
Comment: Just another song in the new age techno tamil genre. Nothing more. Lyrics are also not upto the mark, filled with usual bar-table philosophies.

10. Oh Eesa-Club Mix (Bigg Nikk)
Comment: As the name says it is just a club mix. Nothing music in there to compose as such. Just mixing. You don't need to be a composer to mix in the club.

There are ofcourse many lifts but there are some sample of a good composer in the horizon. If given a chance, I would suggest to GV Prakash, to concentrate on his own compositions instead of lifting.

Communication!!!

Today I was pissed in the morning. The first thing that woke me up was my team members call, to say that the loaned resource from another team had just vanished.

What an unprofessional people, they don’t work because of many reasons, and over that they don’t communicate that they will not be working? Where is this way leading to? No where. This is how India started in all levels pre and post independence, and still we are there practicing the same thing at every level. Now this unprofessional attitude is moving in to IT also.

Bloody we Indians are used to bend and say “Sir!”, come what may. Born and brought up with the thoughts of just being a labor, and nothing more. Even after becoming a manager we are definitely labors, just white collared corporate labor.

The company policy changed a lot in the last 5 years. Now-a-days they demand for 96.5% personal employee utilization. That is nothing but, If I have 2000 hours in a year to work, I should have worked at least 1930 hours, that leaves just 70 hours. This 70 hours are nothing but the holidays that we get in the year. So other than the weekends and holidays, you have to work everyday!!! The policy also says that you are allowed a 22 days of vacation and 10 days of training. But the management on implementation comfortably forgot that.

The only thing here is that, the managers and the employees are also, not caring on these changes. Looks like they are enjoying while yelling, “You make me bend, here you go, I can bend more, FUCK me happily.”

The major problem is fear, and the self limitation of thinking one self as nothing more than a labor. This was the same thing that started off in the governmental organization, bending. Idoits!!!

Glorified Clerks and professional Labors!! They get what they ask for and deserve for. Nothing more!!!

Tic Tac Toe – Probability – Part 1

Just this Tic-Tac-Toe thing came up the mind. Was wondering what could be the probability of winning a 3x3 Tic-Tac-Toe game.

Calculation:

1. The probability of player A playing first is 1/2

2. Say A places his coin on center (1/9) and if player B does not place the coin in corner (4/8), A wins. So chance of A winning = 1/9x4/8

3. Say A places in a corner (4/9) and if player B does not take the center (7/8) then A wins

4. Say A places in the side centers (4/9) and if B does not play in the adjacent 2 squares or opposite 2 squares (4/8) then A wins

Combining the 4 steps: 1/2x( (1/9x4/8) + (4/9x7/8) + (4/9x4/8) ) = 1/3

So what could be the probability of winning in a NxN board? 1/N? Given that N>=3?

Shhhh!!!! I am working!!!

Being a Roman in Rome!!!

I was thinking if being a Roman in Rome, makes any sense these days atleast to Indian Fellas, after all they are the more moving people these days…the corporate slave labors.

Desi in Pardes: Look out for Indian Store, Indian Food, Indian Temple, cook food, Look out for Indian Restaurants what and what not. Every thing look out for Indian. If asked why, they tell “You can take the Indian out of India, but not the India in Indian” . Geeez!! too much !!

Desi in Des: Wear Levi Strauss, Nike, Reebok, Ask girls out on Date, Eat Pizza, Pasta, Garlic Breads, Drink Coke, Mineral Water, and say “yo! man. Life’s Cool!!!”

What the. Where are we actually heading to? Either be a Desi, I mean perfect one or don’t be one. This way or that way, be crisp and clear. If you are mixing beware! Don’t create a dangerous mixture.

On a Cooking Spree!!!

I am back on a cooking spree. I guess this weekend is going to be all about food. Just got the mood set to do that. The dishes planned for this weekend:

Saturday: Lunch: Rice, Aloo Mutter Masala, Paratha. Dinner: Pongal, Mix Veg. Curry. Dessert: Semiya Kesari.

Sunday: Lunch: Peas Pulav, Capsicum Masala. Dinner: Rice, Dal Fry, Brinjal Fry. Dessert: Milk Payasam.

Yummy!!

Aayirathil Oruvan – Music review!!

G.V Prakash Kumar, the music director. Nephew of A R Rahman. Thats his only qualification. No idea why he is still in this field. He lacks imagination majorly. He may be a perfect DJ, remixing songs but not a composer of sort. Even I can straight away map to the origin of the songs, i.e. where it is copied from.

The pathetic part is that, he copied the Govinda Govinda Song that blares from almost most of the speakers in Tirumala. Damn! Dude even if you have to copy you can make it like audible.

May be he needs some break and some more learning on MUSIC. Compared to A R Rahman, he is lacking even the simple things from him. ARR is a real Mozart. GVPK is just a shadow. Not much worth yet!

This is Nice!!!

Now a days, I am getting back into the spree of blogging. Really! Many at times I get bored and think what to do, and now a days my blog is the first thing that comes to my mind. Of course that is the purpose of blogging.

A nice time pass, and a wonderful way to document/pen down my experiences in the day to day life. I like writing, and now that I am getting a hold to it, I am liking it even more.

My days as a test architect and a manager is one that made me even more interested on writing stuff. Many at times I had heard people saying that they hate documentation work. I remember that I had also said the same some time before. But now I like it. The entire process of writing is an art. You have to be imaginative, thinking, and the result should be simple. It should be as simple to explain your thoughts to a lay man. This is the challenge.

Writing experiences, and writing a technical document is not that different from one another. Many people say that you cant read a technical document as a novel. I would say, many people don't write it in that way. I like writing it in that way, a technical doc in a novel way. It will be fun to write and read. Whatever the message will be conveyed.

Earnestness!!!

I bet that all fellow Indians will laugh at this post, and call it pathetic, or a waste of time or to the heights of being stupid. I cant help that, I am being earnest in the things what I am trying to do. Before I start:

Earnestness: An earnest and sincere feeling (Courtesy: Dictionary)

What do I want to post here is nothing but my own experiences in the past few weeks as being an SME and a Manager for a few projects, and also being a joker and a pure dumb-ass for some more projects. I don't know where exactly things started going wrong, but it is all wrong.

There was a time, just a week back in my project, where in I am supposed to assign some work to my team. I had been in meeting all day and all night in some escalation, and could not send the mail out with the work. Actually I spent 3 hours the previous night in deciding and allocating the work. I later knew that I was just being stupid.

The next 2 days my team members came to office, and just left with no intention to even contact me. When I got some time to breath I saw that I hadn't sent this mail out, and 2 days are wasted and I am pissed. At me, at my team members, and at my fellow Indians in general.

I had found that it is always very difficult to define my very own people with some human values, where the very word sounds terrible to them. I don't know, how they would feel, during the moment, when they take their food in their hand and look into it, don't they feel, “damn today I just wasted time, I am not supposed to be paid for today, I was not sincere in what I was doing?”

Ha, May be that's why India is still that way!!!

The major comedy that happened during my discussions as a SME in automation with the team over the proposed design for some new work, was this:

I started explaining the entire facts and advantages and how this needs to be done, and what will be achieved in this, and this is what is actually expected as a team. But, the response that I got from the team was a straight no, and all bullshit reasons, when I asked for, and when I started pushing them for proving me wrong, I started getting cold shoulders. The reasons proved that they don't want to work.

All these guys say is this: “I will not work, what ever happens. I will follow whatever this means – Simply sitting, monthly getting!”

Learning to Say

Learning to say No is one thing that many of my friends advice me, at almost all times. This is one thing that I am trying to but I am not able to do it!

I accept work only if I am able to do it, and of course, I face a lot of difficulty from personal time i.e. the so called Work-Life balance. I feel like I don't have that second half of it. The life part. But the solution is to learn to say NO. I know that that is the solution.

Can I ask someone to teach me how to say a NO? What if they start practicing it right then?

I recently took up an additional responsibility of managing a project, that makes me a Project manager, the only one in the world that will work for that kind of high pressure work for a token payment of 5.12 L INR per annum.

I am learning many things day by day, I can see all colours of people. They are like, you are the manager, so it is your work, not mine, you cook the rice, you make sambhar, you make the curry and you mix them and put it in a bowl, and spoon feed me, only then I will eat, at the same time crib saying that the manager is worthless.

I remember me doing a similar thing like 6 years before, when I was new to the company, but eventually I dint do it, why is it coming to me now? The solution is to intimidate them of being a manager. Never talk to them in a friendly way, after all they do not expect that. All they will ever say is that I don't get paid.

Man this calls for another post in itself. The next one probably.

Real time learning!!!

 

He who knows not, he knows not: he is a fool, shun him
He who knows, he knows not: he is illiterate, teach him
He who knows not, he knows: he is asleep, wake him
He who knows, he knows: he is wise, follow him

some proverb I read some where…

What the fuck is this?

I never dreamt that I will ever write again on this topic, but the fucking life is beautiful.

Bored. The pinnacle of boredom. That’s exactly where I am placed right now. It is not that I am not uninterested or anything like that, but simply bored.

I love my job, it is teaching me a lot, but, I am not in a full mood to learn that much. I know, this will make me slower to catch the boat in my career, but what to do?

I do sound like I need a vacation, but, not in a position to take that. I want to do something drastic to change the course of this life, but, not in a position to do.

That’s exactly what I meant, Catch 22 situation. Time is the answer…

I will wait and see. No energy this time, to take the usual move, of attacking the time and racing past that, my stand by battery is also down. Why? I have to find out. Let me do the searching!!!

Anisuthide Again??

This time I am trying to write this song in Tamil. I will try as much possible to keep the phonetic sharpness and meaning to the same level of the Kannada one! Total time taken: 1 Hour :)

Kannada Lyrics: Italics
Tamil Lyrics: Bold

Here I go:

Anisuthide yaako indu
Neeneyne nannavalindu
Maayadaa lokadinda
Nanagaage bandavalindu
Aahaa yentha madhura yaathane
Kollu hudugi omme nanna, haage summane

Thondriyathey yeno indru
Neethaaney yennavaLendru
Devadai ulagilirundu
Yenakkaga vanthavaLendru
Naane yennai marakkum vali idhu
Kollu penney orumurai yennai, yennai Seradi

Suriyuva soneyu sooside ninnade parimala
Innyara kanasulu neenu hodare talamala
Poorna chandira rajaa haakida
Ninnaya mogavanu kanda kshanaa…
Naa khaidi neeney seremane
Tabbi nanna appiko omme…. haage summane

mazhiyadu vanthathum vanthathu tharaiyinil un manam
Veryaarum kanavil nee sendral thavikkuthu yen manam
pournami chandiran olindhu kondatha
unazaghu mogaththai kanda udan
naan khaidi nee yen siraiyadi
Thulli yennai thazhuvikkol penney, yennai Seradi

Tutigala hoovali aadada maathina sihiyide
Manasina putadali kevala ninnade sahiyide
Haneyali bareyada ninna hesara
Hrudayadi naane korediruve
Ninagunte idara kalpane
Nanna hesara kooge omme… haage summane

un malarennum uthattinil ullathu yendhan uyiradi
en manamendra puthagaththil iruppathellam undhan peyaradi
un udhayaththil illada unthan peyarai
yen idhayaththil naaney sethukkivittaen
unakkunda ithupol karpanai
yen perai padadi penney, yennai Seradi

Yipeee!! I did it!!

Learning?

For the last few days, actually weeks, my learning curve is some what directly proportional to a exponential curve!

I have been learning a lot, from time management, to work and the panache involved in some project management. Should I say I am almost learning every hour?? With all these learning, I am not sure how much could stay in. Now, I am afraid. I was happy that I am learning.

Project management is a ocean in itself! That must be an understatement. I don’t know, how big that is, but I could not see the land in the horizon. Damn! Still there is lots to learn! My head is spinning!

So there are 2 questions that I wanted to ask myself, but I am sure that I don’t have the answer:

1. Am I learning at the right pace or am I slow? There is a lot to learn!!
2. Am I going to keep most of my learning if I go at this speed?

Those two statements sound contradicting! Oxymoron!! Just like this world and me as usual in the middle blinking!!

Un-Categorized feeling!!!

Sometime, I get this strange and uncategorized feeling. This is kind of mixed, if I say in a kitchen recipe style:

1 portion of Jealousy
1 portion of Realization
1/2 cup of learning
1/2 cup of understanding
2 Liters of thinking
1 scoop of self confidence
1 scoop of Imagination

When I see some people doing some nice job, I get the 1 portion of Jealousy, and soon gets mixed with 1 portion of Realization. What I get from this is 1/2 cup of learning, and 1/2 cup of understanding. After soaking all these in 2 Liters of thinking, for few minutes, and adding 1 scoop of self confidence and 1 scoop of Imagination, and blending this on the brain-blender for few more minutes, I get another mixture.

This mixture on fermentation, produces lots of learning and brings me back to the present day! Once the fermentation is finished the mixture's anxiety subsidizes, Oozing out a even clear understanding leading to Acceptance of the way the world and life works!!

Is this recipe is what people call "Mental Maturity Model"??

Awesome song!!!

After a long time I saw “Chak De India” again today! This is not a pirated copy. I proudly own the original DVD (a set of 2 dvds), especially for the original soundtrack and audio effects. Did I mention earlier that I bought a new Home Theater (5.1)??

First time when I saw the movie or this song I accept that I could not feel the actual context and the deep meaning in this song. This time I was just in-to the movie, just allowing myself to get carried away with the current of the movie’s flow. This was a nice experience. The song with the meaning and the perception it was made is as below:

Perception: A true citizen towards his country… (Kabir Khan towards India, in this case)

Mood: Patriotic/Love/Respect?? (Tere Mera Naata Koi Dooja Na Jaana!!!)

Song and Meaning:

Teeja Tera Rang Tha Main Tho
Jiya Tere Dhang Se Main Tho
Tu Hi Tha Maula, Tu Hi Aan
Maula Mere Lele Meri Jaan

I was a part of  your colour
I had lived in your liking
You are my Lord, you are my pride
My lord, I surrender my life to you, take it!

Now I am thinking, am I really the worthy citizen?? Bloody NRI (Non Reliable/Returning Indian)

Found some gold!!!

Finally I searched all my mails and found that some of my old posts are still alive there. I have to dig more now. I think there are a lot more to do…

Simple strategy, if you don’t have new things to do, tear the old things apart and start creating new from that.

Let me see how many I can pull out. I will keep blogging until Google stops blogs. :-)

Old Post: (A)theism??

This is a broad topic. What I wanted to confuse you now, is about GOD. Again, some more on the same topic, that I started blogging with. Here we go....

Before I continue, I wanted to recollect a quote, by some one (actually I dont know who that is, tell me if you know), about something called independence. He says "your independence is that allows you to swing your walking stick, freely anywhere, anyhow, anytime, as far as it never touches anyone."

Why this now? the reason is simple. Right now, there are many walking sticks that are swinging in the society, what I am concentrating here is, (A)theism. This also goes hand in hand with something called Castism.

These are a few questions to confuse you. If you know who EVRamasamy Naicker is then tell me....why he never objected people calling him 'Naicker'?? As he is the one who says there is no god/caste. Why did he attack only a small part of hindus (brahmins)?? Why dint he talk about any other religion??

If you know M Karunanidhi, tell me why he always attacks only hindu myths? Why he never attacks any other religion?

So can I say that there are no PURE Atheists??

If you know, Kanchi Shankarachariyar, tell me why he appeared on TV for publicity, as the vedas and manusmriti says that a yogi should not posses any public value.

If you know Saibaba, tell me why he shows off, his powers of taking lingam and viboothi out of his mouth and hand to the public?

If you know the recent news....tell me for how long Mata Amritandamayee existed in the history? where did she come from?

Where are all the saamys who came in the last decade? are they lined up in himalayas?? I dont think india's population density is high in himalayas.

Ok now jumping layers....

Tell me why there is religion based minority is there in india? It is supposed to be a secular country?

Tell me why most dalits are christians but they attack hindus?

Why should always the person marrying a christian should convert and not the other way around?

Why do christians attack the poor and give them money for conversions?? Dont they believe in their gods power, to make people follow him?? Does he need a representative??

Why are richest cities in the world based on religions?

Could you answer these questions, before you ask or talk about any religion??

Old Post: Changes…

Even if you:

Love or Hate.....
feel Nessacary or Un-necessary....
are ready or not ready....
are wise or stupid....
are brisk or lazy....
are alive or dead.....

Changes Happen....

What kind of changes happen? When does it happen? Will it be easy for me? Do we need to accept all of them? Are we forced to accept? What if I don't? ......

Hey! you.......hold on.....lets take up one by one.....

What kind of changes happen...?
Hmmm. All kind.....it means.....ALL KIND!!! examples.....weather change, place change, health change, people change, neighbour change, environmental change, political change.......etc etc

When does it happen??
Always buddy......any time.....everytime.....most....when they are least expected....

Will it be easy for me..?
Some are easy for you. You'd love some changes.....even if you know you'll lose something....you'll be ready to take up the next challange, and you'd welcome it....example....
Like a bachelor or a spinster taking up their marriage....

Do we need to accept all of them?
No...no neccesary. But, there are a few changes that happen in life, which you'd take up even if you dont like, but for the person you like....example....wearing the pink shirt, that your lovely sister gifted you....

Are we forced to accept?
The fact is....yes....and for MOST. You are expected to take up a change in your life whenever thats posted on you. Expected? who does that? your society. Remember, human beings are social animals, and first society of a person is their family.

What if I don't?
There are two things if you oppose some change, either you are being:
a revolutionist or
a stupid

Alright!...tell me this...
I dont want to be a stupid, also, I cant take the change on me, anyway out?
The ways usually are suggested by the 1.4 Kg, swooshy, cushy, jelly, red flesh that is located inside a hard skull, and it is named brain.
But there are a few points that you might give to your processor so that, it commands you the ways to adapt.
First of all, understanding the change. This involves, knowing what exactly is changing, and how it is going to affect you and you immediate environment.
After this, making sure with your environment, that everyone feels the same about the change.
To proceed, let me take an example, a graduate getting a job in some other city.
Here, there are mixed feelings, for everyone. The change here is directly related to the subject, so it is the subjects responsibility to understand, what is what, and explain to people, who do not welcome it, but their presence in the subjects environment plays a vital role.

What if the person related to the change is confused??
(I'd say...start bloggin....like me....whenever you are confused...believe me you get a solution...:P )
Break the changes into smaller ones, plan for the challenges, cushion for the unexpected, think, consult, think, think, and most important YOU DECIDE....

Most changes are adaptable. Some changes are flexible enough to adapt to you, they change again to suit you, but majority, requires your flexibility.

As said in Bagavath Gita...."Changes never Changes".....

Old Post: Hmmmm…Happy? I am not!!

am happy that I am not XYZ.....Dont think too much on expanding XYZ, they are jus variable.... ;-) actually means nothing....

I was feeling very bad whenever I look at my blog....feeling that I could not write anything interesting.

There are many other blogs that I visited and found that many people blog for jus NOTHING....

These are a few reasons i found ppl blog for
1. flirting
2. fun
3. share
4. cry
5. love
6. hate
7. time-pass
8. job
9. movies
10. piracy
11. porn
12. NOTHING......

I dont know where to place mine.....

Now, some thing i wanted to say.....apart from the one above......

Thats regarding the present way of recruitment going on in India.....in software companies. There are companies that really do some justice in recruiting, but there are also many big bannered ones that bargains recuritment ethics for money....

These are few top reasons, for people to hop companies:
1. Money - compensation
2. Role / Kinda work / environment
3. Managers / supervisors / management
4. personal

Who ever changed their job from one company to another, there must be a lot of your friends in that list, could be you in many cases, jus ask them if they are very happy in this place, and very satisfied on what they got? the answer is a simple NO.....some AHs also support their decisions with sayings like..."you have to lose something to gain something else..." ....Aw......crap!!!!

These ppl are the ones working on products and projects. Company A's product is used by Company B and C's product is used by A and B's by C. This is a huge visious circle. If you find something not working, the blame game goes, base to base.....even yankees dont move so fast....
So obviously productivity is low.

We Indians are by heart very soft natured....atleast to our friends and relatives....thats why we still try pushing ppl into companies.....

How many places actually see competitiveness of the ppl before recruiting....

You say all these to any of your friends during a chat.....all they are gonna tell u is...."this is enough for the crap that we are doing.....".....

This is how Indian politics was when started....and finally living gloriously Stinking.....

What are we gonna do about these??? Will you think about these the next time you sit in the interview panel? when you refer a candidate? when you tell a worthless buddy, not to worry?

Let us see....

After a long time…

I think this is the Nth after a longtime that I am writing here. I always lose track of many things, this is no exception to it. Simply to say, I am a normal human being.

So what did I want to write…hmmm there are many things that were running in my mind the last few weeks. One of that is the meanings of the words “educated” and “learned”. I was wondering why there are two words that means the same. Finally found out that they are not the same. They are something that is completely different. How? I figured out that this is the actual meaning.

Educated: A person is categorized educated if that person had had formal education of some sort. There is again levels in this education. Which are categorized to say, schooling, Diploma, UG, PG, Doctor.

Learned: A person is categorized as learned if that person had had learning from his/her own or others’ experience. There is nothing formal in this. There are no levels in this or at least I haven’t found that out yet.

If that’s the case then why do we need education, everyone will be a learned sometime or the other? That is right. But, how strong will a building be without proper foundation. Yes, education is a foundation. People who hadn’t had proper education became learned but when is the question? What is education, it is the mode of teaching the past experiences that people had experienced and the learning that they got from it. This is education. It will expedite ones learning from the life. If an uneducated person, takes 50 years for becoming a learned, an educated person will take less than half of it. For sure.

Of course, there are many things to it, like the approach. As I said earlier, it is the learning that people got from their experience, so this equates to what is called perception. There are always 359 other perceptions to any experience. So to become learned a person should analyze his education, take all 360 possible angles into consideration and then make a learning of it. This is true learning.

Thiruvalluvar, said this entire one page blog-entry in just 7 words. it goes like this:

karka kasadara kattravai kattrapin
nirkka atharkkuth thaga